I know I haven't posted anything in a while, and my last post didn't end on a good note, but things have been super busy. I just wanted to let my readers know that everything is doing fine. We are all doing fine. I've still been on edge and it worries me a little more when the phone doesn't ring when I expect it to. I still lay there at night wondering where he is, but when I do get to communicate with him, everything is fine.
I always thought I would breathe better towards the end, but it seems as though I find myself holding my breath more and more. It is almost like I am on the edge of my seat when I don't hear from him. I worry about him more since we are so close to our goal. I just want to be in his arms again and I am so afraid that will be taken away from me.
But when I do actually get to hear from him, it is wonderful. The phones haven't been working so it has been awhile since I have heard his voice, but last night I got an email from him with one line and it was all I ever needed to hear. I love you. So simple, yet something so cherrished. I love that man and I can't wait to have him here with me. I'm ready for my life to seem normal again. I'm ready for a routine that makes sense. I'm so ready.
I spent this weekend with some distant family members and they all asked about him and how we were doing. We are doing better than I could imagine - I am doing better than I imagined. I have still remained happy through all of this...somehow. It is his love for me that drives me forward. He is my rock that I lean on when I am having a bad day. I may not hear from him all the time, but his comfort and his strength is still felt during his absence.
He may be miles away from me, but he is never far from my heart. My thoughts and my prayers are constantly filled with his face, his voice, his spirit. I know once we see one another, it will be like no time has passed. He is all I need to feel complete. With him, I know I can make it through anything.